My Self Healing Advice To Get Over Grief And Loss

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5 Important Self Healing Lessons I Learned From Grief and Loss

These words came clear to me on August 25, 2021, when my mother’s time on earth ended, which was going to be a season of grief.

“A time for everything…… a time to be born and a time to die.”

Ecclesiastes 3

Without expecting death so soon, there comes a time when a person will go through a grieving process. Sadly, we all have to experience grief and loss.

First, let me rewind. My mother had been battling a painful disease – cancer (ovarian). And although we know the result of cancer, it still affects the person and those close to them mentally and physically. This is usually not an easy time to see someone facing severe pain. For instance, I walked through this journey with my mother, and even though it was uncomfortable, it was a gift God gave me.

I witnessed my mother take her final breath. The strength, the peace she portrays in her final stage, was a life-changing revelation. I saw.

All my emotions and strength had flowed to a place I never thought I would be. God unveiled that the strength and peace my mother displayed was the grace He has for us.

Now, if you are reading this, you are not alone. I know how overwhelming to see other people experiencing loss and not being able to move on with their lives.

I’m still seeking to have that heavy pain healed. There are days everything in my life feels meaningless. Then there were days I felt my mother’s love telling me to be strong and continue shining.

Unfortunately, this happens after the loss of a loved one or even saying goodbye to someone special. You go through waves of good and painful moments.

For the first time, I had to find ways on how to self-heal. So if you had to deal with grief and loss, allow me to share my deep self-healing journey. I hope this post encourages and protects you from feeling alone, starting self-destructive behaviors or withdrawing to a dark and lonely place, which will tremendously slow down the healing process.

With that said, here are five ways to start self-healing by producing a set of actions that have worked for me.

How To Prepare When Your Loved One Dies

Listen, before I give you my five self-healing advice this is an important information to have. We often don’t plan for death but it will happen at some point to take my advice and start planning. Here are the general things that made the process bearable when my mother passed away.

• Get Life Insurance – Every financial benefit will be a tremendous assistance.

• Research Funeral/Cremation Cost 

• Choose a Funeral Home

• Have a Will/Power of Attorney

• Consult a Lawyer

• Find out the list of people and organizations to notify

5 Solutions for Self-healing to deal with grief and loss

1: Determine what kind of healing you want to get.

Sometimes, more than one kind of help is available, and sometimes not all the choices can make a difference. For me, seeking God was the best self-healing. I witnessed His love in everything that was happening. Every time I felt pain, there was always a song or scripture to encourage my soul. Also, I didn’t have to worry because I knew God wanted the best for me. 

Now don’t get me wrong, there was a time I questioned God and asked why my mother left so soon or why I had to go through this agony. Yet each time, He kept shining His light, and I would feel comforted. 

So, if you’re reading this and not a spiritual person, I’ll encourage you to open your heart and allow Him to take your pain away. His ways are not our ways. He loves everyone equally. 

Related Post: How To Trust God Completely In Hard Times

Step 2: An Acupuncture appointment that feels right

An acupuncture session is one example if a person has health problems and dealing with grief that ultimately returns your body to balance. An acupuncturist will know how to correct your blockage and emotions to renew your body and rebuild itself.

The overall benefits are when the Qi communicate to the organs. 

Sometimes more than one session may even be recommended by the same person at different times during the treatment process. It all depends on your condition and budget availability. I don’t have any preferences and will go once a week or when my body needs it.

3: Seek therapy sessions

Depending on the type of help selected in step 1, make a list of possible therapy services that can provide you with what you want. Sometimes it may be done by phone, through ads placed in newspapers, going to a university library, looking up books or the Internet, etc. It is important that when trying this method, you do not ‘label’ yourself as a person who would only be interested in only one kind of therapy. In other words, find out what is available this way without limiting yourself to any particular methods.

Once you have your list of therapists, please book an appointment or give them a call for inquiries. If the person you are talking with is not sure – inquire further and get more information. All this will be useful in terms of narrowing down possibilities. And remember, there is no need to hurry – it’s good to take your time doing this, especially when it comes to something as crucial as self-healing.

Related Post: 5 Coach Vs Mentoring Truth – Which Is Better For You

4: Be patience, open-minded and practice clearing your mind

Depending on how step 3 went, it may be that you have several to choose from or just one. It can also happen that there is no suitable person for the job, in which case you should continue the search.

Once the therapist has been selected and made, make sure you do this process without any expectations. Expectations diminish possibilities or may even ruin results entirely for some people depending on how strong their expectations are. Of course, it would be good if whatever happens at least partly meets your expectations but don’t get upset when you don’t get what you want. It’s pretty much like visiting a doctor – he diagnoses problems sometimes accurately and sometimes not so much. Depending on his level of expertise and knowledge, he prescribes medication (or recommends surgery), and sometimes it works and sometimes not so much.

It’s the same with self-healing – positive results are more likely to be done for personal development than to ‘cure’ yourself from specific problems.

And one more thing about expectations – when people have them, they are usually biased towards their perspective, which means they only see what they expect to see. So try having no expectations, being patient when going through the self-healing process. It’ll get you the best possible results. Remember to have a positive mindset too.

Dont miss our post and resources issue

5. Take alone time 

After receiving treatment by your preferred method for your chosen length of time – take a break or stop entirely according to your needs, whether you feel you need more treatment or not. For example, I’ve decided to limit who has access to my time during my grief time. Remember, not everyone means good or will understand your loss. Hence I find protecting my space from further pain essential.  

There is also no duration for your healing. Continue until you think it is time to stop and then take a break for an equal length of time and so on.

Bottom line

Remember self healing even when there is little or no sign of progress. It can be challenging, especially in cases where the healing process takes a long time. However, it’s still important because the mind knows that there is a chance for significant improvement, which increases the chances of healing – even if there are some setbacks along the way.

This post is my advice and explains how we heal from trauma emotionally and physically. Following the steps described in the article will help your mind when you feel grief coming on. 

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